Current mood:

hopeful

I want to work full time.

I feel like Bilbo's butter analogy "too little butter spread thin over too much bread"

There seems to be no consistancy in life. I have to do homework but that depends whether I'm working or visiting family. Then I can only visit family when I'm not working. Then Ihave to go to the gym or its just a waste of money.
So perhaps once a week for 3hours I can really relax...but it isn't relaxing, because I'm thinking of what I should be doing with my time and I feel guilty for not doing it. And nothing can stop this guilt! I have tried!

So I think I need to take a break. If my boss can offer me a full time position then I'll defer my course for a year, if not I don't know what I'll do. I just feel like I can't breathe properly. Perhaps full time will give me that consistancy and James and I can share weekends together too. It would be nice...

So please, have kind thoughts about me getting the full time job.